Total Eclipse of the Heart
We try to avoid pain, we try to walk away from challenge, and yet, it seems, no matter how much we try, challenge seems to find its way to our center. We try and practice stillness, we retreat, fold back and isolate ourselves from painful situations. And again, if we observe these actions closely, this motion of withdrawal, eventually, makes us numb, frozen.
The heart knows what the mind chooses to forget. The heart swells through both darkness and light. It has a rhythm, a consistent beat. In and out, back and forth. It beats in unison with the currents of life. On, off, black, white, yin, yang. The magic, of course, lies in the in between. The range of colors and the rainbow of emotions that form from this endless cycle of birth and rebirth. And yet… even with this deep understanding of the natural order of life, we still shy away from embracing our darkness.
Our darkness feels cold and alienating. We attribute pain and isolation to our moments of depression, of fear, of aloneness. If we could personify our darkness, it would be an old, saggy spirit with claws and red blazing eyes. But what if… just if… we chose to embrace and remember that dark implies light. That our moments of shadow imply that just behind this eclipsing sun is a blazing torch of knowing who we are. That this shade of the moon is momentary, it allows us clarity and reminds us of our glory and utmost grace.
The heart eclipses more often than we realize. Actually, many times throughout the course of a day. It swells and contracts. It goes through endless seasons. This journey is what shapes our destiny. This voyage within the peaks and valleys of our consciousness is the essence of growth itself. The masters who have walked this path before, have often said and invited us to look at life with equanimity. The highs and the lows. The deep and the shallow. Nature, they said, has an all encompassing rhythm. The monsoon follows the drought and the storm makes way for the brilliant rainbow.
It is not simple for us to let go our resistance to pain. It is not easy for us to embrace our shadow. But in so doing, a new sense of living forms. A new place of receptivity. A raw sensation of the cold wind blowing on our warm naked skin. Our senses expand, our mind sharpens, and just before it can expand, our heart will gently contract. We grow as we allow and witness these nuances, these signs of growth. As we fear not our moments of challenge and embrace our shadowy moments.
To fall in love with ourselves, means just that. Embracing all there is. The light and the dark, the deep and the shallow. Facing each phase of our eclipsing heart and allowing the growth to occur on its own accord.