My name is Kai Karrel, I’ve been defined and titled in so many ways, mystic, philosopher, shaman, Daka, spiritual teacher; but at heart I always feel I’m nothing more than a very curious soul. From a very early age I was drawn to the mystical, the unexplained. I just knew there has to be more than meets the eye.
I remember being thrilled in reading books or watching movies with any hint of a spiritual world where ancient masters were holding the secret keys to unveiling the mysteries of the universe. I was so excited and in awe when reading ‘Illusions’ by Richard Bach, watching ‘Kung Fu’ with David Carradine and of course my inner world was shaken with the meeting of ‘Siddhartha’ by Hermann Hesse. Following in the footsteps of these spiritual giants, I started practicing different forms of spiritual practices, religions, martial arts and healing modalities.
I devoted my life to the exploration of the mystical, the unknown or unknowable. After living for over 15 years in an Ashram setting, with asking only one primary question, what is my truth, who am I really; I have realized that my perspective is inherently different from most practices or most spiritual traditions, yet holds true to any mystical philosophy and true religion in its essential connected form.
Throughout my life I had the fortune of walking the path of a Hindu priest, a Bhakti Yogi, a Raja Yogi, a curandero, a Zen-Buddhist meditator and an orthodox Jewish Hasid. I got inspired by the Christian mystics, Sufi masters, Tantrikas, Peruvian Shamans and so many others. If there was one pattern which kept showing up, it is that in walking the path of traditional practices, directing towards a ‘seek and ye shall find’ kind of philosophy, or perspective, where the “answer” will always be found where I am currently not. If only you’d practice this meditation, or humbly recite this prayer, then… then… the promised-land will be revealed.
When following this methodology, “answers” do occasionally appear, there are numerous ‘a-ha’ moments, but those are fleeting, transient. I’ve come to realize that the challenge, wasn’t the path I’m walking, it wasn’t the type of practice I was practicing, but the way I was posing the question, and the subtle attempt to find a fixed, solid, non-moving “target”. I kept seeking a certain experience, certain states of consciousness, a very specific state of being. When you walk a number of diverse paths, even some which conflict with others, you can’t help but notice that this form of searching is in its profundity very similar if not exactly the same.
A Bhakti Yogi seeks to disappear when falling in love with their beloved, the Zen monk attains Nirvana when merging into the ocean of consciousness, this attempt towards disappearance, is inherently the exact same attempt whether you’re a Yogi, a Christian mystic, a Tantrika or a Buddhist monk. The difference is not in the path, but with the flavor of existence you’d find when you disappear.